Does it bother anyone else that there are parts of your life you don’t remember? You have done and said things that you don’t even know about anymore. That means you don’t even have the right perception of yourself because you don’t even fully know who you are. However, something that you’ve forgotten about could be a prominent memory in somebody else’s mind. It trips me out.
Oh my GOD
My grandma bought my grandpa new pants and my mom asked him how they felt and he goes “like a cheaply made castle” and we were like what and he goes “no ballroom”
JOIN THE SKELETON WAR, THEY SAID. IT’LL BE FUN, THEY SAID. WELL YOU KNOW WHAT? HERE I AM CLIMBING UP THE SIDE OF A FUCKING BUILDING BECAUSE OF THIS SHIT ASS WAR. FUCK YOU, JERRY, THIS WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA
fun statistics for adults!
“when I was a kid, I had no help with college tuition, I was hardworking and paid it all myself”
-Annual tuition for Yale, 1970: $2,550
-Annual tuition for Yale, 2014: $45,800
-Minimum Wage, 1970: $1.45
-Minimum Wage, 2014: $7.25
-Daily hours at minimum wage needed to pay for tuition in 1970: 4.8
-Daily hours at minimum wage needed to pay for tuition in 2014: 17.3
Hi, My name is Junie B. Jones. The B. stands for Beatrice, except I don’t like Beatrice. I just like B. and that’s all.
if i ever met satan the first thing i would say is “did it hurt…when you fell from heaven??” It would be hilarious. The next thing I would do is probably burst into flame and get impaled dozens of times but it would still be hilarious
no cough syrup
you are not ‘grape flavoured’
have you ever tasted a grape
you taste like death and the tears of small children
not fucking grape
wow what a surprise another cis-gendered white upper-middle class american male telling someone what they can and cannot identify as. why don’t you go fuck yourself